This is going to make me sound soooooooo old, but: what the hell is wrong with kids these days ? Seriously ?
I'm only 25 years old myself so i'm not quite over the hill yet but i just cant understand the behaviour of (some) teenagers these days. In the last few weeks i've seen a handful of programmes which have revolved around the bad behaviour of teens/young adults and how to set them straight, and i'm horrified to say i'm totally on the side of the " fuddy-duddy " parents. The kids featured in these programmes are absolute little asshats and if they were my kids they would have received a sharp clip in the ear ( or worse... ) a long time ago.
For example, i've been been watching this show called " Worlds Strictest Parents ". Its kind of in the same vein as MTV's " Exiled " ( is that what its called ? The one where the SWeet 16 brats get carted off to foreign villages for a week ? ) - two obnoxious, pain-in-the-arse teenagers from seperate families get flown from Australia to live with a new family, with stricter parents, in some other part of thye world. In the first two weeks we've had a pair sent to a hardline Christian family in middle America, and another pair sent to live with a discliplined family in South Africa ...... and only one kid has come away with any significant change in attitude.
The female " participant " last night was so spoiled i wished i could have reached through the tv and slapped her. She told the cameras she only likes one type of pasta and she'll cry and refuse to eat her meal if its not the right stuff. SHE'S 17 YEARS OLD FOR GOD'S SAKE! 17 years old and she admits to throwing a tantrum over pasta..... and she thinks thats ok!?! She reminded her parents she'd be expecting a present on her return, cried because her new " mum " picked on her by making her eat peas, threw a massive tantrum when she was punished for lying to a teacher at school, and then told her parents that her host family were horrible and cruel and " gross " when she finally made it back to Australia.
What a spoiled, brain dead, little biatch. How did her parents let her get like that ?
Its not just me though is it - i cant be the only person my age, the only person in the upper bracket of my generation, who is alarmed by the behaviour exhibited by some of my younger peers ? PLease tell me i'm not prematurely old and that at least one of you agrees!
Showing posts with label teenage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label teenage. Show all posts
Missing You: Teenage Me Edition
So - my sister and i were chatting the other day and she started talking about stuff she missed about " being a teenager ". Ahem - what ? My sister is only 18 years old! Yes, she works almost full time and she has a car loan to pay off and is all done with school, but i had to gently remind her that at 18 years of age, she is still technically a teenager. But it got me to thinking - as depressing as most of my time as a teenager was, what do i miss about the teenage me ? You know, things i had, or did, that i DONT have, or do now......
1. " Rollingstone " magazine - I used to buy " Rollingstone " magazine every month and read it cover to cover. I devoured all the articles, reviews, critiques, everything i could and i discovered some great albums and artists because of what i read in " Rollingstone " - stuff like Nikka Costa, Pete Yorn and Rilo Kiley. I'm not exactly sure why i stopped buying it. I think i can blame America. When i moved to the US i didnt have the money to buy all mny regular magazines, and unfortunately " Rollingstone " was the one that fell by the wayside.
2. Lunch breaks during the last year of high school - ah, lunch breaks, my favourite part of the school day. They were even better than normal during my final year of high school because for a while we " seniors " had what was known as the Year 12 Rec Room - we had a fold out sofa that we could sit/lie on, a stereo, a microwave, kettle and sandwich toaster at our disposal. It kind of rocked not having to share all our stuff with the junior grades - we were big fish in our little ocean! Rock on man! Even when our school had to up and move sites and we'd lost our Rec Room we started bringing picnic blankets and had our own little Year 12 territory on the grassed area of the playground. We'd lost the sofa and the appliances, but we still had a stereo, so each lunch break was like a mini music-fest with your friends. I miss that feel good vibe...
3. Posters on my bedroom wall - i loooooooooooved having posters on my bedroom wall, from the time i was old enough to ask mum to buy me magazines. I used to get a music/film magazine called " Smash Hits " ( which, as you may have guessed, was eventually replaced by " Rollingstone " ) and tear out the posters of my favourite stars, and plaster them to my walls and cupboards. I'd change them monthly - coincidetally, when the new issue came out - but i still had my favourites. Early on, i believe i had a picture of Dean Cain in his " Lois and Clark " days that was kept up for quite a while - but then, thankfully my tastes matured. There was a particular poster of Gavin Rossdale from Bush ( or now better known as Mr Gwen Stefani ) that i had posted on the side of my wardrobe, closest to my head, so it was the first thing i saw when i woke up and the last before i fell asleep. Gavin Rossdale was ( IS ) totally hot!
4. Bonfire parties in winter - pool parties seem to be all the rage here in Australia during summer, but what did we teenage type party people do in winter ? Bundle ourselves up and still have our parties outdoors, with everyone sitting around a huge old oil drum that had been set up as bonfire. The highschool parties i went to didnt really match the parties we saw on tv - it was more set up the bonfire, set up some old logs and stuff as seats and get your drink on. Which would lead to much talking, shouting and occasional making out. Oh, and also random groups of people yelling out " Hey, lets go for a walk " and then you end up losing yourself down some dirt road with only the glow of your mobile phone to guide you back.... yep, that was me.
5. School holidays - or the Americans amongst you would call " summer vacation ". We dont get a whole season off - down here the school year is broken up into four terms/semesters and you have a two week break between three of them and five or six weeks between the end of the school year at Christmas time and when school goes back in January. Its not so much what i got up to during school holidays ( going away with my family, bike tag, three day sleep overs at friends houses ) that i miss - rather its all that free time off! As a working adult it would be som awesome if i could have a five week period off, with pay. Seriously. Awesome.
1. " Rollingstone " magazine - I used to buy " Rollingstone " magazine every month and read it cover to cover. I devoured all the articles, reviews, critiques, everything i could and i discovered some great albums and artists because of what i read in " Rollingstone " - stuff like Nikka Costa, Pete Yorn and Rilo Kiley. I'm not exactly sure why i stopped buying it. I think i can blame America. When i moved to the US i didnt have the money to buy all mny regular magazines, and unfortunately " Rollingstone " was the one that fell by the wayside.
2. Lunch breaks during the last year of high school - ah, lunch breaks, my favourite part of the school day. They were even better than normal during my final year of high school because for a while we " seniors " had what was known as the Year 12 Rec Room - we had a fold out sofa that we could sit/lie on, a stereo, a microwave, kettle and sandwich toaster at our disposal. It kind of rocked not having to share all our stuff with the junior grades - we were big fish in our little ocean! Rock on man! Even when our school had to up and move sites and we'd lost our Rec Room we started bringing picnic blankets and had our own little Year 12 territory on the grassed area of the playground. We'd lost the sofa and the appliances, but we still had a stereo, so each lunch break was like a mini music-fest with your friends. I miss that feel good vibe...
3. Posters on my bedroom wall - i loooooooooooved having posters on my bedroom wall, from the time i was old enough to ask mum to buy me magazines. I used to get a music/film magazine called " Smash Hits " ( which, as you may have guessed, was eventually replaced by " Rollingstone " ) and tear out the posters of my favourite stars, and plaster them to my walls and cupboards. I'd change them monthly - coincidetally, when the new issue came out - but i still had my favourites. Early on, i believe i had a picture of Dean Cain in his " Lois and Clark " days that was kept up for quite a while - but then, thankfully my tastes matured. There was a particular poster of Gavin Rossdale from Bush ( or now better known as Mr Gwen Stefani ) that i had posted on the side of my wardrobe, closest to my head, so it was the first thing i saw when i woke up and the last before i fell asleep. Gavin Rossdale was ( IS ) totally hot!
4. Bonfire parties in winter - pool parties seem to be all the rage here in Australia during summer, but what did we teenage type party people do in winter ? Bundle ourselves up and still have our parties outdoors, with everyone sitting around a huge old oil drum that had been set up as bonfire. The highschool parties i went to didnt really match the parties we saw on tv - it was more set up the bonfire, set up some old logs and stuff as seats and get your drink on. Which would lead to much talking, shouting and occasional making out. Oh, and also random groups of people yelling out " Hey, lets go for a walk " and then you end up losing yourself down some dirt road with only the glow of your mobile phone to guide you back.... yep, that was me.
5. School holidays - or the Americans amongst you would call " summer vacation ". We dont get a whole season off - down here the school year is broken up into four terms/semesters and you have a two week break between three of them and five or six weeks between the end of the school year at Christmas time and when school goes back in January. Its not so much what i got up to during school holidays ( going away with my family, bike tag, three day sleep overs at friends houses ) that i miss - rather its all that free time off! As a working adult it would be som awesome if i could have a five week period off, with pay. Seriously. Awesome.
The Making of Me : A 10 Year Retrospective
Just so we're clear, this meme was originally started by Sheena and even though i wasnt officially tagged i've decided to do it anyway. Basically its a quick rundown summarising the last 10 years of my life. And so, seeing as i'm 24 this year, we start way back in 1998, at the tender age of 14....
1998 ( 14 yrs ) - If i remember correctly, this is the year where i first started to feel a little dark inside. Not that i want to make out everything was doom and gloom, but it was around this time i first started to listen to those self-loathing thoughts in my head. It was also the year i got my first mobile phone and we had internet on our home computer for the first time. And so started my addiction to the Inter-Web.
1999 ( 15 yrs ) - The tenth grade of high school. This is where things started to become serious - important end-of-year exams, getting to invited to parties was almost the be all and end all, and friendships were tested. I got drunk for the first time ( on Stolichnaya Lemon Ruskies .... so old school ) at my friends Brads birthday party. I felt ridiculously cool but was terrified of my dad busting me. Thankfully he didnt and i spent quite a few parties that year ( and all the years following ) getting my drink on. Also, despite being released the previous year, this is the year i started my love affair with " Dizzy Up The Girl " by The Goo Goo Dolls - to this day, one of my top 5 favourite albums.
2000 ( 16 yrs ) - I wrote a lot of poetry this year. You know, the world-sucks, i-wish -i -were-dead, emo kid kind of poetry. I carried a notebook of poetry in my school bag, so that everytime i was upset, angry or plain old bored i could write. Words have managed to sustain me, in some form or another, ever since then. The memory of good times that sticks out in my mind is from my two day biology camp. I sang - the one and only time that i have ever had the guts to sing by myself, in front of other people. What did i sing ? " Slide " by the Goo Goo Dolls.
2001 ( 17 yrs ) - Final year of high school baby! Thank the freaking Lord, because by this point in precedings i was well and truely sick of the place. I loved getting to hang out with my friends, i enjoyed being able to debate intellectually in class discussions, i even enjoyed some of the assignments I had to do - i just hated the institution. I disliked most of the teachers and thoughi dont have a huge problem with authority, I hated being told what to do by people who were, quite frankly, total douches. I hated my English teacher and i'm pretty sure he hated me too. Two months before end of year exams, i walked out of his class never went back. Screw you sucka! The only good thing about gthe final year of high school was the end of it - that is, our Year 12 Formal ( thats a Senior Prom, for you North Americans ). My Formal was pretty ace. The graduating song we chose ? " Higher " by Creed - yep, we rocked much.
2002 ( 18 yrs ) - No more school meant starting work. I've never been to university, not because i'm stupid or lazy, but because i had ( and still have ) no solid idea what i wanted to do with my life. I also did not have the money to waste on some random course that i might drop after a semester or two. So i got a job working retail and tried to save some money. It was in the first few months of this that i was officially diagnosed with depression and social anxiety disorder. I had to watch one of those horrid public service type videos- you know, like if my life were the Simpsons, the film would have starred Troy McClure . Hi, I'm Troy McClure, and you may remember me from such films as " So You're Having a Mental Breakdown! " or " Parties? Who Needs Them ? " ...... I had to break the news to my family and my immediate bosses at work that i was, ahem, " mentally ill ", and started a course of cognitive behavioural therapy with a counsellor. In short, this year was not my best.
2003 ( 19 yrs ) - All that counselling was doing me some good. I wasnt cured and i was still on meds, but I started to develop interests again ( beyond napping - i'll always be interested in that ). I started thinking about a possible career path and i thought i might enjoy working with kids. I started volunteering at my old primary school on my days off, working as a reading tutor with the kindergarten kids. I did that till 11am, and then in the afternoons i'd do a volunteer shift at a childcare centre, just helping out. I enjoyed it, but i still wasnt ready to make a career commitment. I kept working retail and basically just concentrated on getting mentally healthy. It was hard with my best friend moving away this year, but i managed to stay alive.
2004 ( 20 yrs ) - I'd always wanted to go overseas and this year was the year to make it a reality. I figured that because i didnt have the money to just holiday, i could work for my trip. I applied for a position as a camp counsellor and, after many months of waiting, was knocked back because i only had experience with kids under the age of 7. Once upon a time, this news would have knocked me on my arse, but I decided to keep on trying. This proved to be the best decision I ever made - this time i applied to work as an Au Pair in the USA, and was accepted by a family living in New Jersey. I packed up my shit and moved to the US in early November.
2005 ( 21 yrs ) - 2005 started in Times Square, New York City. Fabulous start to a fabulous year, i'd say. I learnt a lot about myself, and who i had the potential to be, whilst living overseas. I loved my family - my three boys, M, T and H - and i made friends with some gorgeous girls from all over the world. I did a four day trek through the Andes to Machu Picchu in Peru ( where i was possessed by mountain spirits - long story.... ) and tested my mental and physical toughness; i went to DisneyWorld on my own and got to skip to the front of the lines; I did 4th of July at South Street Seaport, Rosh Hashanah in Conneticut and Halloween in my local neighbourhood. I joined a gym and fell into being a gym junkie, losing 10 kgs ( about 25lbs ). I returned to Australia a new person, and to be greeted by a new person ( my neice, D.O.B 18.11.05 ). 2005 was a good year, perhaps the best thus far.
2006 ( 22yrs ) - I started the new year with a new job and a new outlook. The previous year had proved i didnt have to live under my bed covers, that if thrown in the deep end i did, indeed, have the ability to swim. I started hitting the pub every weekend, not drinking ( again, anotyher long story ) but just dancing and living it up. I lived for Saturday nights and Sunday morning sleep ins.I definately looked good and i had never felt better.I had a brief relationship with a guy a year younger than me. He was, sadly, so immature that it eventually felt like dating my younger brother, and i broke it off. This was also the year that i i lost my blog virginity. I didnt write poetry much anymore, and an old school journal was just, well, so old school. My bloga attracted the readership of two awesome internet buddies, both still readers now, and our three way conversations became the stuff of legend. By the time Christmas rolled around, i was completely addicted to blogging and had already been to meet with one of my other readers. I'd like to say it wasnt an excuse for a dirty weekend, but that would be a lie :)
2007 ( 23 yrs ) - Ah, the year of living dangerously. Well not technically dangerously, its not like i was running with a gang or anything, i just lot a lot of my old inhibitions. Yes, in THAT way too ( perverts ). I become a fan of local rugby players, and a fan of drunken midnight texts. I maintained my internet buddies friendships and even got the pleasure of meeting up with one of them. Last year felt like a golden year, save for a few small mistakes - things i said but didnt really mean, things i should have said but didnt, things i missed and things i really wish i hadnt have been there for. Most of 2007 was an adventure of sorts, thats for sure....
2008 ( 24 yrs ) - Which brings us to present day Amy. This year has had its ups and downs. Finishing my optical dispensing course = UP. The Mary Incident = DOWN. My best friends wedding and subsequent joy = UP. Slipping back into depression and having to see a pyschiatrist again = DOWN. Getting a payrise = UP. NOt hitting the town for a record 6 months straight = DOWN. Waiting to be an aunty for the second time = UP.
With two months left to go, who knows what could be in store ?
1998 ( 14 yrs ) - If i remember correctly, this is the year where i first started to feel a little dark inside. Not that i want to make out everything was doom and gloom, but it was around this time i first started to listen to those self-loathing thoughts in my head. It was also the year i got my first mobile phone and we had internet on our home computer for the first time. And so started my addiction to the Inter-Web.
1999 ( 15 yrs ) - The tenth grade of high school. This is where things started to become serious - important end-of-year exams, getting to invited to parties was almost the be all and end all, and friendships were tested. I got drunk for the first time ( on Stolichnaya Lemon Ruskies .... so old school ) at my friends Brads birthday party. I felt ridiculously cool but was terrified of my dad busting me. Thankfully he didnt and i spent quite a few parties that year ( and all the years following ) getting my drink on. Also, despite being released the previous year, this is the year i started my love affair with " Dizzy Up The Girl " by The Goo Goo Dolls - to this day, one of my top 5 favourite albums.
2000 ( 16 yrs ) - I wrote a lot of poetry this year. You know, the world-sucks, i-wish -i -were-dead, emo kid kind of poetry. I carried a notebook of poetry in my school bag, so that everytime i was upset, angry or plain old bored i could write. Words have managed to sustain me, in some form or another, ever since then. The memory of good times that sticks out in my mind is from my two day biology camp. I sang - the one and only time that i have ever had the guts to sing by myself, in front of other people. What did i sing ? " Slide " by the Goo Goo Dolls.
2001 ( 17 yrs ) - Final year of high school baby! Thank the freaking Lord, because by this point in precedings i was well and truely sick of the place. I loved getting to hang out with my friends, i enjoyed being able to debate intellectually in class discussions, i even enjoyed some of the assignments I had to do - i just hated the institution. I disliked most of the teachers and thoughi dont have a huge problem with authority, I hated being told what to do by people who were, quite frankly, total douches. I hated my English teacher and i'm pretty sure he hated me too. Two months before end of year exams, i walked out of his class never went back. Screw you sucka! The only good thing about gthe final year of high school was the end of it - that is, our Year 12 Formal ( thats a Senior Prom, for you North Americans ). My Formal was pretty ace. The graduating song we chose ? " Higher " by Creed - yep, we rocked much.
2002 ( 18 yrs ) - No more school meant starting work. I've never been to university, not because i'm stupid or lazy, but because i had ( and still have ) no solid idea what i wanted to do with my life. I also did not have the money to waste on some random course that i might drop after a semester or two. So i got a job working retail and tried to save some money. It was in the first few months of this that i was officially diagnosed with depression and social anxiety disorder. I had to watch one of those horrid public service type videos- you know, like if my life were the Simpsons, the film would have starred Troy McClure . Hi, I'm Troy McClure, and you may remember me from such films as " So You're Having a Mental Breakdown! " or " Parties? Who Needs Them ? " ...... I had to break the news to my family and my immediate bosses at work that i was, ahem, " mentally ill ", and started a course of cognitive behavioural therapy with a counsellor. In short, this year was not my best.
2003 ( 19 yrs ) - All that counselling was doing me some good. I wasnt cured and i was still on meds, but I started to develop interests again ( beyond napping - i'll always be interested in that ). I started thinking about a possible career path and i thought i might enjoy working with kids. I started volunteering at my old primary school on my days off, working as a reading tutor with the kindergarten kids. I did that till 11am, and then in the afternoons i'd do a volunteer shift at a childcare centre, just helping out. I enjoyed it, but i still wasnt ready to make a career commitment. I kept working retail and basically just concentrated on getting mentally healthy. It was hard with my best friend moving away this year, but i managed to stay alive.
2004 ( 20 yrs ) - I'd always wanted to go overseas and this year was the year to make it a reality. I figured that because i didnt have the money to just holiday, i could work for my trip. I applied for a position as a camp counsellor and, after many months of waiting, was knocked back because i only had experience with kids under the age of 7. Once upon a time, this news would have knocked me on my arse, but I decided to keep on trying. This proved to be the best decision I ever made - this time i applied to work as an Au Pair in the USA, and was accepted by a family living in New Jersey. I packed up my shit and moved to the US in early November.
2005 ( 21 yrs ) - 2005 started in Times Square, New York City. Fabulous start to a fabulous year, i'd say. I learnt a lot about myself, and who i had the potential to be, whilst living overseas. I loved my family - my three boys, M, T and H - and i made friends with some gorgeous girls from all over the world. I did a four day trek through the Andes to Machu Picchu in Peru ( where i was possessed by mountain spirits - long story.... ) and tested my mental and physical toughness; i went to DisneyWorld on my own and got to skip to the front of the lines; I did 4th of July at South Street Seaport, Rosh Hashanah in Conneticut and Halloween in my local neighbourhood. I joined a gym and fell into being a gym junkie, losing 10 kgs ( about 25lbs ). I returned to Australia a new person, and to be greeted by a new person ( my neice, D.O.B 18.11.05 ). 2005 was a good year, perhaps the best thus far.
2006 ( 22yrs ) - I started the new year with a new job and a new outlook. The previous year had proved i didnt have to live under my bed covers, that if thrown in the deep end i did, indeed, have the ability to swim. I started hitting the pub every weekend, not drinking ( again, anotyher long story ) but just dancing and living it up. I lived for Saturday nights and Sunday morning sleep ins.I definately looked good and i had never felt better.I had a brief relationship with a guy a year younger than me. He was, sadly, so immature that it eventually felt like dating my younger brother, and i broke it off. This was also the year that i i lost my blog virginity. I didnt write poetry much anymore, and an old school journal was just, well, so old school. My bloga attracted the readership of two awesome internet buddies, both still readers now, and our three way conversations became the stuff of legend. By the time Christmas rolled around, i was completely addicted to blogging and had already been to meet with one of my other readers. I'd like to say it wasnt an excuse for a dirty weekend, but that would be a lie :)
2007 ( 23 yrs ) - Ah, the year of living dangerously. Well not technically dangerously, its not like i was running with a gang or anything, i just lot a lot of my old inhibitions. Yes, in THAT way too ( perverts ). I become a fan of local rugby players, and a fan of drunken midnight texts. I maintained my internet buddies friendships and even got the pleasure of meeting up with one of them. Last year felt like a golden year, save for a few small mistakes - things i said but didnt really mean, things i should have said but didnt, things i missed and things i really wish i hadnt have been there for. Most of 2007 was an adventure of sorts, thats for sure....
2008 ( 24 yrs ) - Which brings us to present day Amy. This year has had its ups and downs. Finishing my optical dispensing course = UP. The Mary Incident = DOWN. My best friends wedding and subsequent joy = UP. Slipping back into depression and having to see a pyschiatrist again = DOWN. Getting a payrise = UP. NOt hitting the town for a record 6 months straight = DOWN. Waiting to be an aunty for the second time = UP.
With two months left to go, who knows what could be in store ?
Oddly Comfortable Deja Vu
So i have spent the majority of the day moving loads of stuff to my parents house. I'm not actually officially moving out of my duplex until next weekend but i thought i'd get a jump on proceedings. I've basically moved all my stuff from my room here to my room there - clothes, shoes, accessories, toiletries and beauty products. I've kept enough stuff here to last me the next five days but other than that its all set up at Ma and Pa's. I have to admit that cleaning out the wardrobe has been like a cleansing ( goodbye old stuff, hello more room in wardrobe for new stuff! ) and the packing, unpacking and moving back and forth has been almost as good a workout as going to the gym.
But you know what ? I have this odd split feeling. Everything feels so familiar - i've put my bed in the same position as it was when i was a teenager, my clothes are all on the same shelves, things like that - but its all so weird too. I'm conflicted - i dont know whether i'm okay with moving back or not, and i dont know whether i should feel grateful that my parents are looking out for me, or irritated that my sister had to move out. Thats quite selfish actually, isnt it? Of COURSE i should be grateful. If it werent for their generous offer i'd probably soon be wallowing in debt. And its not exactly my sisters fault that she lost her job ( the place where she worked closed down ) but she isnt exactly trying enormously hard to look for more fulltime work, so i'm kind of peeved.
On the other hand, it might be nice to have actual conversations with people again. I dont know whether i mentioned it before but the few months my sister and i lived together we rarely had actual discussions - sure, we talked, we jibber-jabbered, but rarely did we sit down and actually talk. So it will be nice to able to, say, watch a news report and then be able to discuss the issue with my parents ( my father in particular ). Plus, it'll be good to save that little bit of extra money. That'll come in real handy when i make the move to Sydney, with its high cost of living and all.
So just think - this time next week i'll be blogging from the comfort of my old bedroom, hanging out on my bed with my cd player blaring, just the way i did when i was 15 yrs old. Only, back then, it was a paper and pen diary and i didnt have an audience....
But you know what ? I have this odd split feeling. Everything feels so familiar - i've put my bed in the same position as it was when i was a teenager, my clothes are all on the same shelves, things like that - but its all so weird too. I'm conflicted - i dont know whether i'm okay with moving back or not, and i dont know whether i should feel grateful that my parents are looking out for me, or irritated that my sister had to move out. Thats quite selfish actually, isnt it? Of COURSE i should be grateful. If it werent for their generous offer i'd probably soon be wallowing in debt. And its not exactly my sisters fault that she lost her job ( the place where she worked closed down ) but she isnt exactly trying enormously hard to look for more fulltime work, so i'm kind of peeved.
On the other hand, it might be nice to have actual conversations with people again. I dont know whether i mentioned it before but the few months my sister and i lived together we rarely had actual discussions - sure, we talked, we jibber-jabbered, but rarely did we sit down and actually talk. So it will be nice to able to, say, watch a news report and then be able to discuss the issue with my parents ( my father in particular ). Plus, it'll be good to save that little bit of extra money. That'll come in real handy when i make the move to Sydney, with its high cost of living and all.
So just think - this time next week i'll be blogging from the comfort of my old bedroom, hanging out on my bed with my cd player blaring, just the way i did when i was 15 yrs old. Only, back then, it was a paper and pen diary and i didnt have an audience....
Dearest me
So i have been tagged, by the lovely Miss Gates, and challenged to write a post - a letter addressed to my 13 year old self. It wont be pretty, but here goes:
Dearest 13 year old Me,
Your going to have to read this very carefully, and take all my advice to heart. I know you really dislike being told what to do - you do, after all, have a mind of your own - but if you dont pay attention that independent mind that you value so dearly will turn itself in on you to the point of wanting to die. THis is no exaggeration.
Firstly, your English teacher Miss Martin, is not an uppity bitch. She appears that way because this is her first proper teaching gig so she is nervous, by the end of Yr 8, you will both have a mutual admiration for each other. She will make you think Shakespeare is cool and encourage you to write, and you will realise that the only reason it appeared that she was picking on you was because she was trying to challenge what she recognised as a feirce intellect.
Secondly, be nicer to your mother. I know you are like chalk and cheese and sometimes you feel like you hate her - HATE her - but you know what? You dont. You hate you, you just dont realise it yet. Sure, she gets on your nerves because you are really as different as two people can be but she's trying to help you, to be there for you, to be the best mother she can be, in her own weird way. So cut her some slack, ok ?
Here's the important paragraph, so pay attention. I'm going to spell this out in big capital letters, because you need for this to sink in: NOBODY IS THINKING THAT ABOUT YOU. Thats right - nody is thinking you are any of the following - too smart; too fat; not pretty enough; not cool enough; uninteresting; unfriendly; retarded, lame, disgusting, hideous or anything other crap you can come up with in that over-active brain of yours. If you keep thinking, and believing, those things you're going to do your head in. You will wind up living inside your own thoughts and you will miss what are supposed to be the best years of your life. So if you want to have a boyfriend soemtime during high school, to be invited to all the " cool " parties, to be able to shar secrets with your girlfriends without fear of being ridiculed stop believing your own, made up press and begin putting yourself out there. You will most probably suffer embarrassments at some point, but you will thank me for it later.
What else ? You're going to go on a school excursion later this year. When you are crying by the pool and Ryan asks why and he sits next to and tries to have a conversation, do not shy away. You think he's cool, make sure he knows it.
Dont stop playing netball. You'll miss it when your 23 and too old and out of shape to get back into it.
By the end of Year 12, tell Casey to pull her finger out and stop being such bitch. You know she is, everyone else knows it, someone needs to let her in on the secret. Also, when you walk out of Mr Hanson's dont just walk out while he's stalked off down to the staff room. Wait til he comes back and proceed to tell him what a c**t he is - THEN walk out.
Try to get overseas sooner. Super Cheap was a nice place to work but you cam alive when you were living away. Keep going to counselling and stay on the anti-depressants to work through your shit than leave as soon is financially possible.
And i thats all i can think of right now. Aside from being good to your family - believe me, you will learn to appreciate them - and keeping up a positive mindset, i dont want to burden you with too much. I want you to use that independent thinking of yours ( i am still you after all, i'd die without my own free will ), i still want you to make your own minor mistakes. Just trust me on the big stuff i've mentioned, yea?
Your ever-loving, slightly-screwed-up, pseudo-hippie 23 year old self.
Dearest 13 year old Me,
Your going to have to read this very carefully, and take all my advice to heart. I know you really dislike being told what to do - you do, after all, have a mind of your own - but if you dont pay attention that independent mind that you value so dearly will turn itself in on you to the point of wanting to die. THis is no exaggeration.
Firstly, your English teacher Miss Martin, is not an uppity bitch. She appears that way because this is her first proper teaching gig so she is nervous, by the end of Yr 8, you will both have a mutual admiration for each other. She will make you think Shakespeare is cool and encourage you to write, and you will realise that the only reason it appeared that she was picking on you was because she was trying to challenge what she recognised as a feirce intellect.
Secondly, be nicer to your mother. I know you are like chalk and cheese and sometimes you feel like you hate her - HATE her - but you know what? You dont. You hate you, you just dont realise it yet. Sure, she gets on your nerves because you are really as different as two people can be but she's trying to help you, to be there for you, to be the best mother she can be, in her own weird way. So cut her some slack, ok ?
Here's the important paragraph, so pay attention. I'm going to spell this out in big capital letters, because you need for this to sink in: NOBODY IS THINKING THAT ABOUT YOU. Thats right - nody is thinking you are any of the following - too smart; too fat; not pretty enough; not cool enough; uninteresting; unfriendly; retarded, lame, disgusting, hideous or anything other crap you can come up with in that over-active brain of yours. If you keep thinking, and believing, those things you're going to do your head in. You will wind up living inside your own thoughts and you will miss what are supposed to be the best years of your life. So if you want to have a boyfriend soemtime during high school, to be invited to all the " cool " parties, to be able to shar secrets with your girlfriends without fear of being ridiculed stop believing your own, made up press and begin putting yourself out there. You will most probably suffer embarrassments at some point, but you will thank me for it later.
What else ? You're going to go on a school excursion later this year. When you are crying by the pool and Ryan asks why and he sits next to and tries to have a conversation, do not shy away. You think he's cool, make sure he knows it.
Dont stop playing netball. You'll miss it when your 23 and too old and out of shape to get back into it.
By the end of Year 12, tell Casey to pull her finger out and stop being such bitch. You know she is, everyone else knows it, someone needs to let her in on the secret. Also, when you walk out of Mr Hanson's dont just walk out while he's stalked off down to the staff room. Wait til he comes back and proceed to tell him what a c**t he is - THEN walk out.
Try to get overseas sooner. Super Cheap was a nice place to work but you cam alive when you were living away. Keep going to counselling and stay on the anti-depressants to work through your shit than leave as soon is financially possible.
And i thats all i can think of right now. Aside from being good to your family - believe me, you will learn to appreciate them - and keeping up a positive mindset, i dont want to burden you with too much. I want you to use that independent thinking of yours ( i am still you after all, i'd die without my own free will ), i still want you to make your own minor mistakes. Just trust me on the big stuff i've mentioned, yea?
Your ever-loving, slightly-screwed-up, pseudo-hippie 23 year old self.
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